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| The Third Man Movie from Enoch Nederostek's blog |
Just a shadow in the corner. Just a gunshot in the night. Just a couple of seconds ended a mans life.
(5 minutes earlier)
Brandon Carter sat in the corner of an alley waiting and thinking about his gorgeous wife. She was one of the maids of the Lord Hammel of Rowland Abbey. She loved her job, loved the people she worked with. She honestly had a God given passion for serving others that this job was able to satisfy. Just last week, there was a visitor at the abbey. The visitor was the widely known Lord Kendrick. Lord Kendrick was a celebrated war general and was never quite the same after he returned from the battlefield. He was a harsh and mean individual that got everything he ever wanted because of his previous accomplishments. When he first saw Mrs. Carter, Kendrick knew he had to have her. She was the most uncommon common woman he had ever seen. She had fair skin, beautiful hair, and eyes that seemed to dance. As Mrs. Carter was cleaning the house, Kendrick grabbed her and took her into his room. When she refused him he struck her in the face. Mrs. Carter managed to escape Lord Kendrick's grasp and ran out of the room all the way back to her home to Brandon Carter. In tears, she told her husband everything. Brandon tried to calm his hysterical wife and comforted her until she fell asleep.
After his wife had finally gone to sleep, Brandon left the bed, got dressed, wrote a note in case his wife awoke worried, grabbed his gun, and headed to the town. With revenge in his eyes, headed toward the local bar where he recalled a neighbor mentioning seeing Lord Kendrick. He waited in the alleyway for hours. For every minute he sat there his anger builded, it took everything in him to stay calm and silent like a shadow. He wanted, no, he needed to defend his wife's honor. He could not believe someone could be so cruel to the nicest woman he had ever known. Once he thought he reached his breaking point, the door of the bar opened and Lord Kendrick emerged, proud and drunk. Carter stood raised his gun and said "This is for Rebecca" and pulled the trigger. The sound abruptly broke the silence of the night and Brandon Carter walked away from Lord Kendrick's body and never looked back.
Author's Note: I based this off of the story Bhima and Kichaka from the Mahabharata. As I read this story, I was reminded about an episode of Downton Abbey. I decided to do a blend of this story and Downton Abbey. In the original story, Kichaka was brutally murdered, I wanted to make it a little less messy and just have Brandon kill Kendrick with a gunshot. In this version of the story, Bhima is Brandon, Kichaka is Kendrick, and Draupadi is Rebecca.
Bibliography: The Indian Heroes by C. A. Kincaid (1921)
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Chelsey,
ReplyDeleteI love the setting you placed this story in. Mysteries are my favorite stories, and The Third Man is a great movie, so right from the beginning I was a fan of this story. The changes you also made to clean up the original story were positive changes. Thanks so much for sharing, I look forward to reading more.
Andrew
Hi Chelsey,
ReplyDeleteGreat story! Just by reading the title I figured it is going to be something scary and mysteries, which I am not a big fan of. But still you did a good job in putting the story together. In Addition to that, great idea. I enjoyed reading your retell story. I am looking forward to read your other blogs and stories.
Hi again Chelsey,
ReplyDeleteI really liked this story. Like Aysha, I thought this story was going to be a bit scary, but you did a really good job. I liked that you changed it from a brutal murder in the original story to a more "clean" (bad choice in words on my part) murder. You did a wonderful job. It was really fun to read. Keep up the good work :)
The picture you used definitely evoked a classic film-noir setting to the whole story. You then built on the suspense of the Mrs. Carter's close encounter which allows the reader to become wrapped in the story at an early point. There is also a good depiction of the background of the main characters without boring the reader. I wonder if you will use images like this in your later works.
ReplyDeleteWhen I saw the image It reminded me also of a late 50's setting. You did a good job telling your story. It was concise and straight to the point. Brandon was determined to defend his wife. The way you told the story it was hard to feel sorry for Lord Kendrick. I also like the way he left the scene with no witnesses. Thanks for sharing!
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